Hermit Mode

Just when I was starting to socialize again, Halo 3 comes out. Goodbye, world. I will see you in a couple of weeks (months?).

SRT #55

I got a wrong number this afternoon, and the guy on the other side was actually polite. New and different, I know. When it was clear that we did not know each other, he asked who I was, to which I responded, "Hey, man. You called me. Who are you." He laughed and said something that sounded like Brent.* It instantly became clear that this was, indeed, an error on his part. He promptly apologized, I said, "No problem," and all was well.

And then my phone rang within the next minute. Same number calling. I pick up again and inform him of his mistake. He apologizes and asks me to confirm the number he's been trying to call. It is, indeed, my number, but unfortunately, I am not who he wishes to speak to. He apologized again** and hung up.

This is really new and different for me. Usually wrong numbers are big jerks who somehow blame me for owning someone else's phone number, or they act as though I'm the one running around misdialing calls. I once spent five minutes on the phone going through this routine over and over:

Jerk: Who is this?
Me: You called me. Who is this?
Jerk: No. Who is THIS?
Me: I am the owner of this phone. Who is this?

I was much too stubborn to hang up and admit defeat. Clearly, the other person is a bigger jerk than I am. In any case, I hope this will become an ongoing trend. Strangers being polite to one another. Anything is possible.


* Perhaps Brad? Something with a "B."
** Again!

I'm Going to Disagree

So why do I have a picture of a fatty up, you may ask? No, I do not personally know this fatty, and really, if I wanted to look at a fatty, all I need to do is find a mirror. (I had to get the self-deprecation out of the way before it someone else did it. You know who you are. I win.) I saw it a couple of weeks ago on the Nordstrom website. I was just browsing around the sales and this thing assaulted my eyes. The problem is not so much the model, or even what she's wearing. The problem is that this model cannot possibly be that size. Clearly, she has a pillow or something similar wrapped around her torso so as to fill out that suit.

Is this really necessary, Nordstrom? Could you not find any reasonably attractive people that will actually fit this suit? I know that such people exist, I have seen them wandering about this land. I vehemently disagree with this model casting. It's not right. Just get a plus sized model for christsakes. They need to eat too. Clearly, if they didn't have that urgent need to make a living/eat, they wouldn't be plus sized models, would they? So Nordstrom, take pity. Feed a model that needs the work and save this tiny model from having to wear a fatty suit. Ok? Iappreciateitthanksbye!

Solomons Island

Crabbing is weak there now. It makes my heart cry.

I Need To Decide My Life Soon

I'm feeling especially bloggy today, and my brother posted a link to a career placement something or other that I just finished. Here's my top ten plus highlights:

1. Desktop Publisher
2. Lobbyist
3. Animator
4. Cartoonist / Comic Illustrator
5. Criminologist
6. Gerontologist
7. Fashion Designer
8. Probation / Parole Officer
9. Director of Photography
10. Set Designer

12. Addictions Counselor
14. Clergy
21. Critic
25. Translator
33. Marriage and Family Therapist
37. Sport Psychology Consultant
39. Politician

Some of these are actually quite hilarious. Clergy?! Really, after God's recent treatment of me, I THINK NOT. I guess I'd enjoy being a translator, if not for that pesky lack of multilingual skills. Parole officer? Criminals scare me. It doesn't matter if you're a rapist or a billionaire humanitarian serving time for avenging his murdered family. I don't care if you did really hard time or spent it dancing to Sister Act music. I'm crossing the street if I know you did time. I know this is a sort of terrible/bigoted stance, but that's how it is. Some of these really are absurd. The most, however, must be Addiction Counselor. It is only my fear of criminals that has kept me from finding new and exciting addictions. I have quite the addictive personality. It can only be attributed to divine intervention that I never picked up some terrible drug habit, a lifestyle which was quite available to me.

Hm, perhaps this divine intervention is the cause for God's spite? Have I never thanked Him (Her? Shim?) for the guidance away from addictions more terrible than shoes? If not, I'd like to post an official THANK YOU for such aid. I appreciate it, I really do. I mean, if all my money went to drugs, how could I afford these?

ADDENDUM
I was about to hit publish, when I reached inside of my jacket pocket and found the Vanilla Mint Coffee lip balm that I thought I had lost a while ago. THANKS, GOD! YOU'RE AWESOME!

ADDENDUM #2
Another reason for thanks: My hair is kinda awesome today. I didn't put any product in it post straightening, and yet it's super awesome. Like, suprisingly awesome. It's perfectly floppy without being out of control. :D Thanks, God!